You Know You're a Mom...

You know you're a mom when:

• you're kid is on the verge of expelling something from some orifice (puke, poop, snot, etc.) and you instinctively lunge towards him to attempt to "catch" it rather than jumping out of the way like the normal human reaction should be.
• you wake up so often to a bright eyed, wide smiling little creeper 2 inches from your face whispering "mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy, me need eat! mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy? mommy?" that it doesn't even startle you anymore.
• even with no kid in the car you habitually point and say things like: "Look, buddy! Choo choo!", and "See the cows?!? Moooo!"
• you're never really completely out of diapers. there's always at least one stashed in every purse, laptop case, vehicle seat pockets/glove compartment, suit case, reusable shopping bag, and refrigerator fruit drawer.
• you don't recall how a diaper came to be in the refrigerator fruit drawer, but it's been there going on two weeks. At least it's unused. 
• you go to work with random breakfast remnants on your shirt and think to yourself, "It could be worse. At least it's not something gross." (refer to the first item in this list)